“I have just been to see Her Majesty
and I will form a majority menagerie.
I want to thank all those dear creatures
who screamed so hard for this success.
Zoo elections can be difficult
with so many lusting after pink hippogriffs,
lusting so profoundly after pink hippogriffs,
only to see their dreams turned into politics.
The menagerie I led did important screaming
and everything turns upon that vital hinge.
A good life is in reach for everyone willing
to scream their hardest for the proper thing.”
“Thank you for your kindness, monkeys!
Monkeys, this is not the speech I wanted to give today
because I believe our Zoo needs a screaming menagerie!
I still do, but the beasts voted otherwise last night.
So I accept absolute and total bananas for our result
and pleasure myself to this final Zoo insult.
I’m flinging out my…
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